The Ultimate Baddies Guide to Spring Cleaning: Ranked from “Ugh” to “Yass”

Spring cleaning. The words alone can make you roll your eyes harder than someone telling you to “just relax” when you’re already stressed. But let’s face it—there’s something satisfying about turning your space from chaotic gremlin den to sparkling goddess sanctuary. To help you tackle the beast, I’ve ranked the most dreaded (and secretly satisfying) spring cleaning tasks from “seriously, why?” to “feeling like a domestic deity.”

10. Cleaning the Fridge

Let’s start with the worst of the worst. Cleaning the fridge is a science experiment gone wrong. Who knows what’s lurking in the back corner? That half-used jar of pesto? Expired. Those mystery leftovers? Don’t even look. It’s gross, it’s smelly, and you’re 100% questioning your life choices—but hey, at least you’ll have room for new snacks!

9. Scrubbing the Shower

Why does scrubbing a shower feel like training for the Olympics? Between the soap scum, grout grime, and that suspicious pink stuff (what even is that?), it’s a full-body workout. On the bright side, the post-clean sparkle makes you feel like you’re stepping into a 5-star spa every morning.

8. Organizing the Junk Drawer

Ah, the junk drawer. A chaotic black hole of rubber bands, old receipts, and batteries of questionable usefulness. Sorting it out feels like digging through your past mistakes—but when it’s done, the satisfaction is chef’s kiss. Bonus: You might actually find that thing you swore you lost last year.

7. Dusting Ceiling Fans

This one’s just plain rude. Why are ceiling fans always so disgustingly dusty when you barely use them? The second you turn it on, it’s like a confetti cannon of filth. But once it’s clean, you can feel smug knowing your home’s air circulation is drama-free.

6. Decluttering Your Closet

This is where the real Marie Kondo vibes kick in. You’ll swear you have “nothing to wear” and then discover 27 tank tops you forgot existed. Purging clothes is tough, but donating that blazer you haven’t touched since 2016? That’s a good karma boost.

5. Washing Windows

Washing windows is shockingly satisfying. Sure, it’s annoying to get started, but watching all that grime disappear? Instant gratification. Plus, you’ll finally see the world through literal clearer lenses—and who doesn’t want that energy for spring?

4. Vacuuming Under the Couch

What’s under there? Dust bunnies? That earring you lost in 2021? A family of crumbs? Sure, it’s a bit scary, but once the horrors are gone, your living room feels instantly fresher. Pro tip: Blast your favorite playlist and pretend you’re Cinderella—but sassier.

3. Reorganizing Your Pantry

Turning your pantry from chaos to Pinterest-level chic is a top-tier power move. Label your jars, line up your spices, and create a snack zone that rivals Whole Foods. Suddenly, you’re the kind of person who has it all together (even if you only fake it).

2. Freshening Up Your Bedding

Is there anything better than the feeling of crisp, clean sheets? Throw in some fancy fabric spray, fluff your pillows, and boom—you’re living that luxury hotel life without the room service fees. (Though, let’s be real, you deserve room service.)

1. Rearranging Furniture

This is where the real magic happens. Moving your furniture around makes you feel like an HGTV star. Suddenly, your space feels brand-new, and you didn’t even have to spend a dime. Plus, it’s an excellent excuse to take selfies in your freshly zhuzhed-up space.

Final Thoughts

Spring cleaning may be a hassle, but it’s also a glow-up for your home and your energy. So grab your rubber gloves, turn up the music, and get to it—you’re about to slay this cleaning game like the domestic queen (or king) you are.

Now tell me, which cleaning task do you dread the most? Or better yet, which one makes you feel like Beyoncé in a freshly Windexed house? Spill in the comments!